ADDICTION IN THE FAMILY

Drug and alcohol addiction is a problem that many families must face. It is never just an individual problem. It's always a family problem, because it impacts every member of the family. Many families choose to keep it a secret. This eventually leads a family to codependent behavior, motivated by fear of circumstances getting out of control.

Loving members of the family may actually become enablers to the one who stubbornly refuses to change. The secret stays in the family, fearing what others may think or say. This leads to a dysfunctional family and codependent behavior that not only effects current members of the family, but the codependency is more often perpetuated to future generations.

Points to Consider

Drug and alcohol addiction has lifetime memories and problems for the entire family. Codependent behavior begins in childhood with those who fearfully maintain the family secret. The great fear of codependency is losing control. Understand that addiction is a family problem.

Drug and alcohol addiction is a bio-chemical problem. Professional help is needed. The addiction takes control of the person, becoming a form of bondage. Will-power is not the solution. Medical help is available.

Drug and alcohol addiction is a domestic problem which can lead to spouse abuse and divorce. Separation may be necessary to avoid physical abuse or violence. Threats and promises may be made to keep an abused spouse or child from leaving, but such promises are short lived. Threats may be carried out. It may be necessary to leave.

Drug and alcohol addiction is a financial problem. The results often leave a person unable to sustain employment resulting in financial difficulty for the entire family. Financial problems are one of the three leading causes of divorce in the USA.

Drug and alcohol addiction is a spiritual problem. God's help is available through prayer. The addicted person must honestly be willing to make a change of lifestyle. The addicted person must see the personal consequences, as well as those to other family members. Self-centeredness must be seen as a destructive pattern of living. Asking for God's grace through Christ is the focus of prayer.

Overcoming alcohol and drug addiction is a day by day decision. Accountability to others, and support groups are needed. Such support can be found through the family, the church and groups which focus on overcoming addictions.

Tough love is required from the family. The addicted family member must be held responsible for personal behavior. The family must refuse to play the role of enablers to the addictive lifestyle.

          SOURCE: DR.RICHARD TRADER